The Experiment
Character Genital Sizes
I have written this supplement in response to my own, and a few of my player’s musings on the subject, and the realization that this could actually affect things in the game. Because of that, the decision to make the process random was made. Remember, this is entirely unofficial, so your GM will have to decide whether to use it or not. However it does not in any way contradict any published rules so it would be acceptable to use under the HMGMA regulations. —Anarkitty
Section M – Male Characters:
To determine genital length, first determine the base size by rolling 10d6 and taking the average of all 10 rolls (so 10d6 / 10), then apply the racial modifier found in table M1. The resulting number is the length, in inches, of the character’s genitals. 3% of characters have the possibility of being truly exceptional. In these cases penetration rules (as for damage) apply to the dice rolled before averaging.
Next look at table M2 for the effects that a given size has on the character. Armor cost is the cost of having armor modified to accommodate particularly well endowed characters. If this is not done, the character incurs a movement penalty equal to the number in parentheses and is extremely uncomfortable and restricted. Remember, the comeliness adjustment only applies to characters and NPCs that have first-hand knowledge of the size of the character’s genitals (sight, touch, divination, etc.). To other male characters whose own length is less than 1/3, the com adjustment is considered negative (unless it is already) due to jealousy. Also, for the purposes of armor costs, a Large character is considered to have 1/2 their actual genital size, and a Small character is considered to have double their actual genital size.
Character race: | Modifier: | Racial average: |
Human | +3 | 6.5” |
Elf | +1 | 4.5” |
Half-Elf | +d3 | 5.5” |
Dwarf | +2 | 5.5” |
Gnome | +3 | 6.5” |
Halfling | 0 | 3.5” |
Gnomeling | +(d3-1) | 4.5” |
Half-Orc | +2d3 | 7.5” |
Half-Ogre | +5 | 8.5” |
Pixie-Fairy | x1/2 | 1.75” |
Length: | *Com adj: | **Armor cost: |
0-2” | -2 | - |
2.1-4” | -1 | - |
4.1-8” | 0 | - |
8.1-10” | +1 | +5% (-1) |
10.1-12” | +2 | +10% (-2) |
12.1”+ | +2 | +15% (-3) |
**Note that if armor is already being custom-fit this cost-increase does not apply.
Section F – Female Characters:
To determine the breast size of a female character, simply roll the percentile dice, and add or subtract the modifiers shown in table F1. Cup sizes are relative, so a modifier simply shows a propensity for a given race or class to favor larger or smaller breasts. Then look up the resulting percentage on table F2. Note that the listed sizes are relative to body size, so a D-cup on a Gnomeling might only look like a B-cup if they were on a Human, while a Half-Ogre’s A-cups would still be quite large relative to a Human’s B- or C-cup. Pixie-fairies’ breasts obviously are relatively very small.
Finally, look up the appropriate listing on table F3 for the effects of a given relative cup-size. Note that Com adjust only applies to characters and NPCs attracted to females. Armor cost is the cost of having armor modified to accommodate particularly well endowed characters. If this is not done, the character incurs an attack penalty with melee and missile weapons (not crossbows) equal to the number in parentheses and is extremely uncomfortable and restricted. Breasts of size D and above incur an additional -1 attack penalty when using bows (but not crossbows).
If bindings or wrappings are used count breast size as one category lower, including for the purposes of firing bows. Bindings are uncomfortable and cannot be slept in.
Human | 0 | |
Elf | -5% | |
Half-Elf | 0 | |
Dwarf | +5% | |
Gnome | -5% | |
Halfling | +10% | |
Gnomeling | -10% | |
Half-Orc | +10% | |
Half-Ogre | 0 | |
Pixie-Fairy | +10% | |
Barbarian | +10% | |
Cavalier | +5% | |
Paladin | -5% | |
Cleric | -5% | |
Thief/Assassin | -5% | |
Monk | -10% | |
All other classes | 0 | |
Each point of STR above 15 | +1% | |
Each point of STR below 7 | -1% |
<1% | Just nipples (“raisins”) |
1%-3% | AA-cup (developing) |
4%-18% | A-cup |
19%-62% | B-cup |
63%-90% | C-cup |
91%-99% | D-cup |
100%-105% | DD-cup |
106%+ | DDD-cup** |
**Incurs a -1 to attack
Size: | Com Adj: | *Armor cost: |
None | -2 | - |
AA | -1 | - |
A | 0 | - |
B | 0 | - |
C | +1 | +5% (-1) |
D | +2 | +10% (-1) |
DD | +2 | +10% (-2) |
DDD | +1 | +15% (-2) |